All The Songs Make Sense
by WhiteDaisies
Summary: A series of one-shots about the Castle/Beckett love/hate relationship.  You know its love when all the songs make sense, and in their case, all the love songs could've been written about them.
1. A Many Splendorded Thing

_A/N: So…in explanation to this story. I was thinking, in the shower of all places this morning, about this song from Moulin Rouge called Elephant Love Medley. It's basically a mash up of all these songs about love, with the two characters disagreeing about love. It struck me as a perfect way to look at the Castle/Beckett relationship. So this is going to be a series of one shots, probably unrelated, that are based on parts of the song, of varying lengths. I hope that makes sense._

_I'll leave up the Ewan and Nicole's in the lyrics so that it makes sense._

_For those of you who are wondering, I'm still working on Frosty. I will have another chapter up, hopefully tonight. But that's almost finished and I wanted to get this up while I had the idea._

_Enjoy!_

**A Many Splendorded Thing  
**

[Ewan:]  
Love is a many splendored thing,  
Love lifts us up where we belong,  
All you need is love!  
[Nicole:]  
Please, don't start that again

"But how can you say that?" Castle said, looking incredulous.

"Love is a bonus Castle. Your life is what you make it; it's either happy or sad. You set your life up the way you want it and if love comes your way enjoy it." Beckett said as if she expected that this was common sense.

"I thought all girls dreamt about their love all their lives. You know, some people center their lives around finding their one true love." Castle pointed out. They had reached her desk, coffee in hand, from the break room. He sat down with a look his face indicating he believed he had won.

"This may come as a shock to you Castle, but I'm not most girls." Beckett leaned back in her chair, looking at him with an almost smile on her face.

"Believe me, I'm well aware." He took a sip of his coffee with a glint in his eyes. "I still think that love is the best part of living. Love makes everything worthwhile."

"When you've seen people murdered in the name of love, you start to feel differently." Beckett countered, a new thought suddenly appearing in her mind, "Why are we having this argument… again?"

"You started it!" Castle said and crossed his arms.

"I did not. Just because I just finished a case where a girl got murdered by her fiancé does not mean I started this argument."

"I just want you to believe in the magic of love." Castle said in a rare sincere moment.

"Why is it that important to you?" Beckett asked, exasperated.

"Because…because how sad is life if you don't?" Castle said. "It's like not believing in Santa Clause." He said with a wink.

"Oh we are not having that argument again."

"Just…..just close your eyes and imagine this." Castle started and waited a moment for Beckett to roll and then close her eyes. "Imagine the most beautiful girl you've ever seen. Her life hasn't been perfect, but whose has? She gets up every morning and goes to work like clockwork. She goes out of her way to help others. At her job she diminishes other people's pain like she wishes someone had done for her. She dates sometimes but she never gives anyone her heart. She's afraid to get hurt again. So she works all the time to avoid going home to an empty apartment at night….Doesn't that sound sad?" Castle asked after spinning his tale that sounded to Beckett a lot like it was her life. Maybe that's how he meant it to sound. But either way, she could only nod in response to his question. No words would come out. "But the story doesn't end there. One day when she least expects it, one man worms his way into her life. He does it so slowly she doesn't even notice that he's burrowed down into her heart, past all the walls that she's erected over the years. He doesn't push her too fast; he just waits for her to catch up to where he is. And once she realizes what's happened, he's in so far there's no way she can extract him without leaving a giant hole where he's been." A small smile graces Beckett's taught face. "And that's what love is for her. And that small thing, to her, is magic." Her eyes flicker open slowly and she catches his eyes. She stars at him for a moment, looking slightly confused and awfully touched.

"Magic huh?" She asked almost whispering.

"Magic. It's different for everyone. But magic it is." He smiled at her.

"I hope I get to experience that some day." Beckett said, with a wistful look on her face. "But today, I have to fall into love with this paperwork." She flipped the switch to professional in the blink of an eye.

"I hope I do too." He said quietly, thinking no one can hear him. But Beckett catches it briefly and it makes her smile.

_A/N: What do you think? Stupid idea? Should I continue? Let me know!_


	2. All You Need

_A/N: Well this one is a little different but I think it still plays with the differences in the way Beckett and Castle view love. Maybe not. Let me know what you think!_

**All You Need**

[Ewan:]  
All you need is love!  
[Nicole:]  
A girl has got to eat!  
[Ewan:]  
All you need is love!  
[Nicole:]  
She'll end up on the street!

Beckett couldn't sleep, she couldn't think. She was pacing her floor in her apartment for an hour. She needed someone to talk to and that was all there was to it. She needed to talk about the case they had just finished, somehow put it to rest. It was killing her. She couldn't take it anymore. She grabbed her keys and headed out the door. She got down to her car and she knew exactly where she wanted to go. It was the why she was still working on.

She pointed her car into traffic and silently made the drive. She pulled up to his apartment building and sighed. Some kind of psychological magnetism pulled her here and she didn't understand why. She was frustrated with herself and but even being outside his building calmed her psyche some.

She rode the elevator up to his floor and paused, hand raised, at his door. She took a deep breath and chided herself. This was not a big deal. This was her friend, her partner, and she just needed to talk about their case. She knocked slowly and waited.

The door slid open slowly and she saw his head peak around the crack in the door. "Beckett!" he said with a smile, opening the door completely. "What are you doing here?"

She didn't answer. She couldn't. her eyes traveled down from his face to his bare chest. Further down her gaze was only impaired by a white towel hanging from his waist. She shook her head, trying to clear her mind. "Can I come in?" she finally asked.

"Of course." He stood back and allowed her to enter. He took her coat from her and draped it on a stool in the kitchen. "What's up?" he asked again. Again she was silent, starring at his wet hair.

"Couldn't sleep. This case, that little girl…." She started, her voice sounding very small to her own ears. She finally met his gaze and he had a soft, sincere look in his eye.

"I know." He said softly.

"I just….you already knew about it…" she said slowly and he took a step towards her, and then another. He closed the distance between them and she panicked for just a moment. He pulled her into a hug and she buried her face in his bare chest. She breathed deeply and sighed. She finally felt at peace. He stood there, holding her, for as long as she needed.

* * *

"Girl, start over. What happened?" Lanie asked the next day over drinks with Beckett. Beckett had been regaling her experience the previous night with Castle, feeling confused about what had compelled her to go see him.

"I went to his apartment…" she started again, but again Lanie interrupted.

"Unannounced and uninvited?" Lanie asked. Beckett gave her an annoyed look.

"Yes. I'll never get through this if you keep interrupting." Lanie nodded and motioned with her hands for Beckett to continue while she sipped her martini. "When I got there he didn't have on anything but a towel." Lanie raised her eyebrow in mock Beckett fashion, but she kept her mouth shut for once. That is until Beckett didn't continue.

"What happened with naked Castle?" she asked, prompting her friend to continue.

"He…" Beckett blushed a little, making Lanie all the more curious. "gave me a hug." She finished.

Lanie stared at her for a minute with a blank look on her face. "He was naked and he gave you a hug?" Beckett nodded, bringing her own martini to her lips. "That's all?" Beckett nodded again. "Hmmmm."

"Well? It's weird right?" Beckett asked her guru friend.

"Well, it would be weird for me, but for you two? I think it's normal."

"What do you mean?"

"Come on Kate!" Lanie exclaimed, sitting up straight suddenly. "You two have been an old married couple since you met. You need to just go for it with him because he loves you."

"He does not!" she exclaimed, incredulous. "You know how much of a player he is."

"Has he ever tried ANYTHING like that with you?" Lanie asked. Beckett sat silent for a moment, having nothing to say. "Mmmhmmm, he loves you. He probably doesn't even know it but he does. And you care just as much about him. You need to get that man naked and do much dirtier things than hug."

"Even if all that were true, we work together, Lanie. This is my job, this is my life. I can't have him jeopardizing that." Beckett pointed out.

"One, he wouldn't. And two, a chance at love, real love, is worth it." Lanie said.

"Who knew you were such a hopeless romantic?" Beckett asked with a smile on her face.

"Girl, if I could find what you two have, I'd drop everything in a heartbeat." Lanie said and gave Beckett a knowing look.

"Whatever." Beckett rolled her eyes, taking another sip. "You can't live on love."

"No. But if you have love, you can live on a lot less than you think you can."


	3. Just a Game

A/N: Well, here's the next installment. I caught a writer bug tonight and updated both my stories. I actually quite like this one. It kind of went in a direction I wasn't expecting, but I think there are several different levels of this. And things got turned around and I like it better than my original idea. Anyway, I'm rambling. Let me know what you think!

Just a Game

[Ewan:]  
All you need is looooove!  
[Nicole:]  
Love is just a game.

"That sushi was amazing! How did you ever find that place?" Beckett asked as they walked back into the precinct together after lunch.

"I honestly can't even remember where I heard about it. But the food is always amazing, the fish is so fresh." He said, smiling at her meaningfully. It made her slightly uncomfortable and she fidgeted a little. She cleared her throat and walked to her desk with him in toe. He was kicking himself for making things awkward after a relaxing lunch.

She logged into her computer and he sat in his chair, thinking back to the case they were currently working on. They didn't sit like that long before Beckett's cell phone buzzed on her desk top. She looked down to see a text from Josh. She opened it and read it. Her brow crinkled as she reread the evidently confusing message.

"What?" he asked.

"Just a text from Josh. It doesn't really make sense. He says 'haven't heard from you and just wanted to make sure everything's ok.' What does that mean?" she asked, getting slightly annoyed. She missed the guilty expression that crossed Castle's face next to her as her anger began to build. "He has to check up on me now when he hasn't heard from me in a few hours. What the hell? I'm at work. He's at work! I don't have to check in every ten minutes." She was fuming. Finally she looked over at Castle who looked like he just wanted to hide. "What?"

"Well….." he looked very sheepish. "Could you calm down before I tell you? I don't want residual anger."

"Castle I will hurt you. What did you do?" she said, looking fiercely at him.

"Well, you see….Josh may have called your desk phone earlier today when you were in a meeting with the Chief. And I may have answered said call. And he may have left a message asking you to call him on your lunch break. And I may have forgotten to pass that along." He said and winced when he finished his story. An eerie silence feel over Beckett as she thought this through.

"Observation room. Now." She said slowly through gritted teeth. She stood up from behind her desk and walked in slow measure steps in that direction. Castle followed her, looking like a child about to be beaten. He mouthed "Help Me" to Ryan and Esposito as he walked past. They just shook their heads at him.

Inside the observation room, she closed the door behind them and leaned against it. She counted to ten. Then she yelled.

"You had the audacity to answer my desk phone, take a personal call for me, take a message from my boyfriend and then NOT give it to me? Is that what you're telling me?" she asked walking slowly towards him, pointing her finger in his direction. He walked, step for step, backwards. His face pulled as he tried to think of a good answer.

"Well you see, I…" he tried, but he stopped when his back hit the back wall.

"No, you do not get to pull any of your writer words crap on me. There is no talking yourself out of this. You crossed a line and there are consequences for that." She said, her finger finally meeting his chest, her eyes boring hole into his.

"In my defense, I honestly forgot." He said, with a small smile.

"And that's better? Castle, this kind of thing might be a game to you but it's not to me. We're not talking deep fried twinkies here. We're talking a real adult relationship that you're sticking your nose in and screwing with."

"Hey that's not fair."

"Oh yeah." She said, shifting so that she could cock her head up at him. "Correct me where I'm wrong." Her gaze was steely, and scary.

"Love is not a game to me." He said sincerely.

"Right, that's why you parade bimbo's through here like the flavor of the week. That's why you go back to ex-wives for a little hot sex every now and then. That's why you get divorced twice instead of…" she said, running out of steam.

"Instead of what? Hmm? Never letting anyone in close to me? If that's a game, then yeah I play. It's called Russian Roulette with your heart." He said, looking actually hurt. It was her turn to be silent for a moment and process.

"That's not the point. You're messing with another person's relationship. You're playing games with my life and I'm TIRED of it Castle." She said, her arms finally hanging at her sides, as though exhausted.

"Tell me this." He said in a small voice, looking her straight in the eye. "If it's so inexcusable that I forgot to tell you to call him, if it's so inexcusable the thing that I did, then why haven't you noticed that you haven't responded to his text? Why haven't you called him instead of standing her arguing with me?"

She opened her mouth but then closed it immediately. She tried again but no words came out.

"You play your own game detective. It's called 'How can I push him away and yet still pretend that it's not my fault.' So don't judge me. I may not have done the one and done thing, but that doesn't mean that I treat my relationships like a game. I care for every woman I'm with. And one I'm not allowed to be with. And I would never hurt them." He said, looking her in the eyes. "Now, go. Make your phone call." 


	4. Made For Loving You

_A/N: Ok, so I considered taking it to an M place with these lines, but I decided to go a different direction. I'm sure, looking ahead at some of the lines, that this could be arranged for future stories if you guys are interested. If you'd rather keep it more in this realm though I'll see what I can do. So just drop me a line and let me know what you think about the ratings thing. Oh and what you think about this ;)_

**Made For Loving You**

[Ewan]:

I was made for loving you baby,  
You were made for loving me.

Beckett had moved into Castle's apartment when hers blew up because she didn't have any other choices. She could have crashed on Lanie's couch but she felt guilty about putting her out. And she knew the Ryan or Esposito was the same story, but again she didn't like the idea of owing them anything. The way she saw it, Castle already owed her. Not only did he bug her in her everyday life, she was also the source of the major payoffs he was getting from his books. So this wasn't charity, it was just fair exchange.

The first morning she was in the Castle home, she woke with a start. She didn't know where she was for a moment and she reached for her gun under her mattress. But it wasn't there. Suddenly she remembered she was in Castle's apartment and she had left her gun downstairs in her purse the night before. She didn't want to wear a gun around his family so she'd put it away and forgotten about it.

She swung her legs over the edge of the bed and stood. She oversized t shirt and leggings weren't warm enough to stand the icebox of Castle's apartment at night (he claims he really can't sleep if its hot). She wrapped her arms around herself and moved, half awake to the door. The only thought in her mind this early was coffee. She rubbed her eyes as she walked, which meant she was walking blind for a few moments.

She heard a door open to her right but she didn't register what it meant in her sleep deprived, exhausted mind. That is, until she felt her body slam into a very solid object. In her surprise, she felt herself losing her balance and she gripped the first thing her hands came into to contact with to keep from falling. Once she felt secure on her feet, she looked up. She met the blue, grinning eyes of Castle. Her eyes trailed down to her hands gripping his biceps. Then she felt that his hands had come to clinch her waist and steady her. She met his eyes again, her eyes taking in the smile on his face.

"Good morning detective." He said, making to move to change his position. She registered the smell of an early morning Castle. When she saw him, he was usually showered and cologned to smell his best for the day. This was a more primal, earthy smell and it was intoxicating. She couldn't seem to move herself.

"Morning." She mumbled. She felt her hands drift slightly up and down his arms, enjoying the way the slightly muscled arms felt under her skin. His fingers drew circles on her waist.

"This is a nice way to wake up." He said and winked at her. She snapped out of it at that look on his face and extracted herself from his embrace.

"Don't get used to it Castle." She said pointedly. It didn't matter how nice his body felt against hers.

* * *

A few weeks later Castle was feeling a little frozen out in the precinct. Beckett was still in his apartment, looking for a place that would do until she could find what she really wanted. But housing in the city on a cops salary with her standards was hard to find. She was probably feeling a little claustrophobic, being with him at home and on the job. He was doing his best to give her some space, but there was only so much space to give.

She bristled when he walked up to her and rejected any interjections he had to offer on their case. At first he tried to be understanding and let it roll off his back. But it had been a week now and it was really starting to piss him off. So when he saw Beckett walk towards the break room that day, he took action.

He walked up behind her as she was in the middle of making an espresso drink. He stood in the doorway for a moment, gathering his thoughts before he approached her. Slowly, with measured soft steps he walked towards her. When he was about two steps from her back, he saw her body tense but she was obviously trying to ignore him. He pushed further at this, and walked so close to her that a piece of paper could barely fit between the two of them. He leaned his arms on either side on body, trapping her in front of him.

"You're not getting away this time." He whispered in her ear, sending a chill down her back.

"Castle…." She sighed and closed her eyes.

"No, just listen." He knew she could feel his breath on her ear as he spoke low and slow. He wanted it that way. "I understand you need your space. But don't push me away here." He said. He heard her sigh again, this one however sounded like she was surrendering. She surprised him when she leaned back against his solid chest, and he could see her eyes were still closed. He couldn't help but notice the perfect way her body fit with his, like two pieces of a puzzle.

"Castle…" she tried again, but her voice sounded breathy to his ear. She shook her head slightly against his chest, and he could smell the scent of cherries fly into the air. "Not here." She finally whispered. She stood up on her own and finished making her coffee. "I have work to do." She said and to his ear, she almost sounded sad.

* * *

That night, they walked back to his apartment from the precinct. It was a nice clear night but she still wrapped her arms around her against a nonexistent chill in the air. They walked side by side, their bodies never touching.

"Dinner?" he asked her after a couple of blocks.

"Want to order in?" she asked. She saw him nod quietly. "I don't care what." She said, not actually feeling very hungry. They continued another couple of blocks in silence until his building came into view. "Alexis and Martha?" she asked wondering what she was heading into.

"Gone for the weekend. Together for once, doing a spa thing." He said quietly as they reached the building. He held the door for her to walk through.

"That's nice." She said simply. They walked to the elevator and she pushed the button. She fidgeted in the elevator as it ascended to the penthouse apartment.

Inside the apartment, she shed her coat and shoes while he ordered Chinese, they're usual. He came back into the great room with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "Should be here in 20 minutes." He said, looking into her eyes.

She nodded and they stood like that for a moment. She finally couldn't take it anymore and she opened her mouth, "Castle, I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For being rude to you. You opened your home to me, took me in as a stray. I really appreciate it and I fully intend to pay you back." She started, staring at her shoes.

"Not necessary. You know that." He said, taking a step towards her. She met his gaze and took a step towards him.

"I've been cranky this week. I'm feeling displaced." She stared around the room sadly. "You're place is amazing Castle and you've been amazing. But it's not home to me. I don't have a home." She said and her shoulders slumped.

"Beckett." He said and took the final step to close the distance between them. He opened his arms and she warily stepped into the embrace. She took a deep breath and felt her body relax in his warmth. "Perfect fit." He said, a smile on his face. She smiled into his chest and squeezed him just a little tighter. He started to sway slightly as they just stood there quietly. "We were made for each other you know." He said finally.

She pulled back slightly and look confused, "What?"

"We make a pretty good team." He said, repeating a line he fed her occasionally to annoy her, this time said sincerely.

"You don't have to be Hootch." She said and leaned back in for another quick hug. He could have sworn he heard her murmur, "We do make a good fit."

"Want to see if we fit in other ways?" he asked, pulling back to waggle his eye brows at her. She slapped him on the arm.

"Way to ruin the moment." She said with an eye roll.

"Sorry." He said and winked at her. "Sometimes I do feel like we were meant to find one another though. You know, star crossed….whatevers."


	5. A Lovely Fee

A Lovely Fee

[Nicole:]  
The only way of loving me baby,  
Is to pay a lovely fee.

It was a slow day around the precinct, which meant two things for Kate Beckett. The first was the assurance that she would spend her day up to her eyeballs in paperwork. Overdue paperwork, lost paperwork, her paperwork, their paperwork, etc. The other was that Richard Castle would inevitably be bored by the prospect of a day like that. He wouldn't, however, leave when she suggested it because someone might die any minute. And she had an inkling that he felt bad about leaving them when their job was boring.

All of that added up to the moment that was staring Beckett in the face.

"What did you think of me when we first met?" she put down the pen in her hand and leaned back. She looked at him like she looked at her suspects in interrogation. She studied him for a moment, trying to read him.

"What?" she finally asked. She was still trying to figure out if this was sincerity or boredom talking. The tricky thing was with Castle the two were not mutually exclusive.

"On our first case, what did you think of me?" he asked again, turning his body to face her. "I already know you wouldn't sleep with me. I just wonder what else…" he said. His eyes had a mischievous gleam in them that she couldn't place.

"Seriously?" she asked again, evading his question masterfully. Unfortunately, he wasn't buying it.

"Stop avoiding the question Beckett." He looked at her with a serious gaze. Her stare faltered as she looked down at her paperwork and back up to him. She smiled finally.

"I don't think you could handle knowing." She finally said. It was a good fake, she thought. It put the blame on him and kept her from sharing.

"I'm a big boy. I'm go to the restroom to cry if I have the need." He said and smiled. She laughed a little at him and sorted the papers on her desk. They were actually all complete.

"Fine." She said as she was staking. He placed them neatly on her desk and leaned back again. "I thought you were a guy who was used to letting his good looks get him what he wanted. You were reckless and self absorbed. You consistently undermined the chain of command and my authority. I thought you were a stuck up play boy, bored with his money and his attractive women out on a field trip." She finally answered, staring him down the entire time.

"Wait, did you say I was good looking?" he asked, eliciting an eye roll from his favorite female.

"You would focus on that detail. Don't let your ego swell on my account." She said, shaking her head.

"Come on Beckett, I wasn't that bad." He finally looked at her with a serious face and she felt bad for hurting him.

"On that first case, yeah you were. But you've grown up a little since I've known you. Alexis has been a good influence." She smiled, and it actually reached her eyes.

"Yeah, she's great…" he looked far away for a moment before returning to Beckett. "Can I ask you another question?"

"Sure Castle why not? I don't have any other work to do." She said, and threw up her hands.

"Oh don't pretend this isn't more fun than your paperwork." He gave her his knowing look as she flushed just slightly.

"What do you wanna know Castle?" she asked just before taking a sip of her coffee.

"Why didn't you sleep with me?" he caught her by surprise and she spit her coffee back in her cup. She slowly turned her chair so that her body was facing him and gave him an incredulous look.

"Excuse me?"

"I'm honestly curious. Most women I know jump in bed with any decent looking man who asks." He shrugged, trying to imply this wasn't a big deal.

Beckett eyed him for a moment before saying, "Castle, exactly what kind of women do you hang around?"

"Have you met my mother?" he said, raising his eyebrows. "Seriously. I wanna know."

Beckett rolled her chair up to her desk and made it look like she was working again. Then quietly, out of the corner of her mouth, she said, "It would have cost too much." For a moment Castle sat confused, uncertain of what she meant. Then he figured if he remained quiet she might elaborate. And he was right. "If I had slept with you, knowing only what I knew of you at the time, I would have lost something. A little dignity, self respect, or something."

"It cost too much." He murmured, nodding his head while he thought that over for a moment.

"It was too much to pay for a night of amazing sex." She whispered so softly he almost couldn't hear her. She was pretending to go back over her page, pen in hand but he could tell her eyes weren't reading what was on the page. Finally she looked up and he winked at her.

"Amazing would be selling us both short don't you think?"


	6. Just One Night

A/N: So, this is set at the end of 3XK, which is conveniently playing next week. Originally, my idea for this chapter was to take it to the obvious place. However, as I got to thinking about it, I decided neither Castle nor Beckett would say just one night for that. So…this is what I came up with instead. I think it feels….better. I know there have been a lot of stories about what happened after this conversation but I guess this is my take on it. Let me know what you think!

Just One Night

[Ewan:]  
Just one night,  
Give me just one night.

"I just feel so…" he shook his head. There were no words for what he was feeling. That in and of itself was strange for Castle but he'd never felt this sort of weight in his chest before. He'd felt guilt, he'd felt pain but this feeling was somewhere muddled in the dark spaces between those feelings. Throw responsibility in there and you might come close to the feeling that was currently constricting his chest.

He felt her hand slide into his. She gave it a comforting, understanding squeeze. "I know the feeling." She said simply, never looking at him. She understood his turmoil and the fact that no one, and nothing, could take it away right now. Only time would help. He looked down at her hand in his and for a moment felt this unbreakable connection with her, like they'd lived through the same war or seen the same ghost. Maybe they had.

She just sat there with him like that, letting him grieve for the innocence he had lost in the moments he was in that hotel room. She grieved for it too. She remembered what it felt like to have that torn away by some stranger. She'd first experienced it when her mother died, and several times since then it had come back to her on the job. She hated that he would never be quite as carefree as he once had been. She hated that she wouldn't be that person ever again either.

It felt like an eternity passed and yet it felt like it might have been five minutes. Time had lost meaning for the moment and all he could think about was the way his own heart felt beating in his chest. He relished that simple rhythm of a few moments. Finally he squeezed her hand back and she knew the worst of it was over.

"Come on." She pulled on his hand slightly. "I'll take you home. Martha and Alexis are worried sick." She said with a half smile that felt fake, even to her. He looked at her with his damaged eyes and simply nodded. She stood and dropped his hand as he did the same. She gestured for him to lead the way but he let her catch up to him and walk beside him. He purposefully let their shoulders touch every so often, just to feel her. Just to make sure she was still there.

She climbed in her car as her phone rang. "Beckett." She answered softly as he joined her. She listened for a moment to whoever was on the other end. "Ok, I'll see you guys in the morning. Thanks for seeing this through." She said into the phone, then hung up as she started the engine. She pointed the car in the direction of his loft and drove in silence for a moment.

"I want to see them." He said, staring out the window. She nodded slowly, a little uncertain of what he meant. The one thing she did know was that words from her wouldn't help so she remained silent, thinking he would work it out in his own mind. "Mother and Alexis. I want to see them, but…" he said, turning those eyes on to her. She read pure pain in them now.

"I know." She cut him off. She did know, she'd felt it. "You feel like you're not the same person you were when you left them this morning. You don't want them to worry but you feel like you can't shake the pain." She looked at him and she saw understanding there and appreciation. "Close?" he nodded. "They'll understand, eventually. Right now they won't care, they'll just be happy to see you." He nodded again and stared out of the window again. Several slow minutes passed in the light traffic as she tried to decide whether to say more. Finally she opened her mouth again. "It'll be hard, but it'll pass. It's just a moment."

She pulled her car into the underground garage at his apartment. As she pulled into a space near the door, she heard him sigh beside her. She turned the car off and put her hand on his knee. "I'm always here for you. If you need me." She said. He paused eerily still for a moment.

"Come up with me." He said, putting his hand on top of hers. "Please." She simply nodded her head and got out of car

* * *

Inside the apartment, Alexis rushed to her father with tear stains on her face. Martha's hands shook as she reached for her son. Beckett tried to draw as little attention to herself as possible, hanging around in a corner. That is, until Alexis drew her into a bone crushing hug.

"Thank you." Was all the girl said before moving back to her father. Martha exchanged a knowing look with Beckett and the younger woman blushed.

"I don't know about you two, but I could use a stiff drink. Richard, I'm raiding your liquor cabinet." She said, waving her hand in the air. It made Beckett smile.

"I'll help." Beckett said, following Martha into the kitchen of the loft. She felt better being useful. As Martha pulled out a wonderful old scotch, Beckett lined up three glasses. Martha filled each glass with a little more than two fingers.

"Good scotch cures any number of wrongs done to a body." Martha said with a wink to Beckett.

"Can't hurt. No way to know how much it will help though." Beckett said with a weary look on her face. Beckett took two glasses into the living area, one for herself and one for Castle. She took a seat in the chair caddy corner to the couch Castle and Alexis were sitting on. Martha took the other side of her son.

The foursome was silent for a few moments. Castle had his arm around his daughter, lightly stroking her arm. She seemed to be breathing him in with every breath she took. Martha just kept sneaking peaks at him, as if to make sure he was really still there. Beckett watched the scene silently from the corner, knees pulled up to her chest.

Martha drained the last of her glass and sat for a moment before slapping her knee. "Well, kiddo, I'm glad you're alive. But it is time for some sleep so that we continue to remain alive tomorrow. Alexis?" she said, raising an eyebrow at the teen. All four individuals rose to their feet and Alexis gave her father a long hug. He smiled sadly over the top of her head before placing a kiss on her hair.

Martha dragged Alexis off to put her in bed for the night. Castle finally turned his attention to Beckett who was standing about five feet from him. She smiled a wary smile.

"I guess I'd better be going." She said, picking up her glass to take it to the kitchen. Castle followed with his own glass and his mother's. At the sink, where Beckett rinsed out all three, he stood next to her. He starred off into the distance, seeing nothing. When she was done, she picked up the hand towel, drying her hands. She turned her body to face his.

"Well…" she started. He turned to face her as well and their eyes connected. He searched hers and she searched his, silent for a moment.

"Stay." He finally whispered, still holding her eyes.

"Castle…" she sounded tired and hesitant. She bit her lip as she continued to search his eyes.

"Please. Just tonight. Don't make me sleep by myself tonight." He said so earnestly it made her hurt.

"What about…" she gestured in the direction Martha and Alexis had headed in.

"They'll understand." He said, and he pulled her into a hug. She froze for a moment before raising her arms to encircle his lower back. "Please. I can't sleep alone. I need to know I'm not alone and you…" he faltered.

"Know the feeling." She finished for him, still hugging him. "Ok." They broke apart momentarily. He let his arm circle her lower back as he led her in the direction of his bedroom. She thought about threatening him to keep his hands to himself, but she decided against it. Not tonight. Somehow she knew it wouldn't be a problem.


	7. You Can't Pay

You Can't Pay

[Nicole:]  
There's no way,  
Cause you can't pay.

"Castle, how do you manage to think up this crap?" Beckett turned to face him while she sat at her desk. She had a slightly amused, slightly annoyed, slightly awed look on her face.

"The crap about being frozen to death inside a refrigerator, or the true crap about our case?" he asked, looking slightly into the air, as if lost in thought. When he came back to earth, he smiled slyly at Beckett. She rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"Either kind of crap." She said simply.

"Hey, the true crap caught our murderer." He said, pointing his finger at her. She smiled slightly at him and begrudgingly nodded. He let the moment lie for a moment before he said anything else. "I'm starved. Remy's?"

"Ooo, that sounds amazing." She said, looking at him out of the corner of her eye. "Paperwork can wait, right?"

"Oh my god, did hell just freeze over?" he jerked, pretending to feel the shock waves of an earthquake.

"No, but I just saw a pig fly by that window." She said, not looking at him. She was trying to hide her smile.

"Oh ho ho. Funny." He said, smiling at her. She finally looked up at him and smiled back. "And there's the smile."

* * *

They sat down at their usual booth in the diner, and Kate tugged at her hair just a bit. She looked out the window, seemingly lost in her own world.

"Penny for your thoughts." He said, a vague smile on his own face.

She turned to face him, a lie on her tongue. But the honest, sincere look on his face made her blush. "I was just thinking…." She said and trailed off.

"See the point of that phrase is that you actually elaborate on WHAT you're thinking about." He said, talking with his hands. She rolled her eyes yet again at him, just as the waitress walked up. Castle looked up at the woman standing in front of them and turned on a little charm. "We'll have two cheese burgers with everything. Extra fries. And two milkshakes, one chocolate and one…" he trailed off studying Beckett with his eyes. She raised an eyebrow at him, waiting to see if he'd get it right. "Strawberry." He said, a smile slowly spreading across his face. Beckett couldn't help but smile back as she nodded. Once the waitress left, he looked encouraging again. "So you were about to say what you were thinking about."

"Why don't you tell me? Apparently you're a mind reader." She said, leaning back, challenging him.

"Mmmm, you're thinking you really want to see me naked." She rolled her eyes yet again. "Oops, sorry that's what I'm thinking." He winked at her from across the table. "Seriously, I only had three choices of shakes. Call it luck."

"I was thinking about what I said earlier." She said after a moment's hesitation. The waitress came by and placed their plates on the table. Beckett nodded and smiled her thanks before eating a fry. "Sometimes I wonder how you think of all that you think of. I mean, it's one thing for me to assess the situation I have at hand, theorize how it happened, and place together pieces from there. But you…..you create the elaborate details. You imagine all the pieces of the puzzle." The honest moment surprised even her as she finished talking. Castle picked at his food for a moment, thinking.

"We work in opposite directions. You start with a victim and you build from there. Me? I start with a murderer, imagine what kind of crime he would commit. I imagine who his victim would be. Then I imagine his movements and what types of evidence he might have left behind on accident. I have the answer before I start. All you have are questions." He said, eating a fry. She nodded as she took a big sip of her shake. "That's just the murder part though. For the other, more spicy details, I just use my dreams as inspiration."

She jabbed the heel of her shoe at the spot she imagined his foot would be. Unfortunately, she missed slightly and wound up brushing her foot against his under the table. He raised an eyebrow at her cautiously. "Your foot was supposed to be under my heel." She said, in lieu of an explanation. She picked up her cheese burger and missed the smirk on his face. He brushed his foot back against hers, leaving it slightly on top hers. She nearly choked on her food, making him laugh. He moved his foot away from her, going back to his own food.

They sat like that in silence for a few more moments, just eating and enjoying one another's silent company. Finally he broke the silence between them, after thinking about what she had said for a moment.

"Do you really think it's hard, what I do?" He asked, sincere once again.

"I think there's no way I could do it. I think it's amazing that you work on one case and one novel for so long. I'd get bored." She said with a shrug.

"I guess it's just second nature to me." He looked down at his empty plate, surprised to find their dinner had passed by so quickly. The waitress brought the check and laid it on the table. Castle picked it up and looked it over before standing. He moved to the register to pay for their meal.

Suddenly, while he was standing in line, someone jerked the check from his hand from behind him. "You are not paying for mine." He heard Beckett's firm whisper in his ear.

"Why not?" he turned to face her as he asked.

"You gave us the missing piece to the case. So I should be treating you." She shrugged, not really looking at him. She bit her lip. In her moment of inattention, he snatched it.

"There is no way you're paying for mine." He said, giving a her a weak glare.

"Why not?" she asked, hands on her hips.

A smug smile appeared on his face as he answered, "My mother didn't teach me much that I live by. But she did teach me that a gentleman never lets a woman pay." He winked at her.

"It's not a date Castle." She said, still staring him down.

"I'm currently trying to decide if I'm more scared of you or my mother. It's a dead tie." He said, looking truly torn. Beckett looked up to see that they had moved to the front of the line and the person behind the register was looking at them expectantly.

"Fine. But I get the next one." She said, crossing her arms. "And don't try to weasel your way out of it."

"Wouldn't dream of it, Detective."


	8. There's No Way

A/N: Ok, yes, I did it. I wrote a response to Knockdown. The positive of this is that it got me to update this story. Oh, and the story in itself is a positive. So, in reality, I see no down side. Anyway, it's really actually where I see these characters going. That is, in terms of overall themes. This is how my weird mind got them there. So don't hate me for the way it ends.

There's No Way

[Nicole:]  
There's no way,  
Cause you can't pay.

It had been a week. What did it say that she had started measuring time in its relationship to that night? Instead of it being Thursday, it was now a week from last Thursday. The fateful day that had lead her down an entirely different kind of rabbit hole than she'd ever been down before. It had been a week since she had felt his lips on hers, tasted him for the first time, and gotten caught up in a type of gravity she had never felt before.

She sat at her desk, staring at an email she was pretending to read about more budget cuts. It was always the same story anyway. Any time she let her mind wander within the last week, it had been to that night. More to the point, it was always to the sensation that coursed through her body as his lips touched hers. She still felt her stomach drop every time she thought about it and her toes tingled ever so slightly. She shook her head, trying to snap out of it. Just as she looked up, she saw him walk into the precinct, his normal goofy smile on his face. Two coffees rested naturally in his hands. He sat down in his chair and handed her the cup in his left hand. Her fingers felt hot where they touched his slightly when she grabbed it from him.

He didn't say anything, which was completely uncharacteristic. What made her more nervous than that however was the small twinkle she saw in his eye. He sipped his coffee and she narrowed her eyes suspiciously at him. Taking a sip herself, she decided to ignore him. She reached for a case file on her desk and began to fill out paper work inside it.

"No one died today?" he asked, seemingly innocently.

"Not yet." She said without looking up.

"Hmm, slow day." he said, musing almost to himself. She rolled her eyes at the disappointment she heard in his tone. She continued to write and he continued to sit in silence for a moment. "Well, I really need to get some writing done. I seem to be flooded with inspiration lately." He let that thought sink in so that she slowly turned her head to catch his eye. She gave him a warning look. "I'll be at the Old Haunt. Come by after your shift and I'll buy you a drink." He said with a smirk. She eyed him suspiciously for a moment longer before nodding her head slowly, reluctantly. "Call me if a stiff turns up though." He said in his usual crass way.

"Castle…" she said, a chastising tone in her voice.

"I know, I know. Insensitive. What was I thinking?" he said, a smile under his words as he walked away.

* * *

It turned out that no "stiffs" showed up that day. It had been a long, lazy day spent doing paperwork and collecting too much pent up energy. Beckett sat at her desk, feeling her legs jump on their own but feeling unable to stop them. She checked the clock again. About 15 minutes until her shift ended. She felt her legs pick up the pace. She tried to return to her paperwork, but felt her eyes gloss over. Her phone vibrated next to her.

_I know when your shift ends. I will know if you stand me up_. The text read. Of course.

_Wouldn't dream of it_. She texted back, an involuntary smile creeping onto her face. She looked up to see the boys packing their things away and did the same thing. She locked her files in her drawer and pulled her purse out of another. She grabbed it and her coat in time to clock out with the boys and walk to the elevator with them.

"Wanna grab a slice?" Esposito asked, looking from Ryan to Beckett. Ryan shrugged.

"Sure, why not? Jenny's not home anyway." He said and looked over at Beckett, expecting her to join them.

"Sorry boys. I have plans." She said, with a secretive smile on her face. She pushed the button for the elevator and they went to talk behind her back.

"Motorcycle boy again." Esposito said with a wink at Ryan.

"How many times do I have to tell you, its Motorcycle Man." She said, with a small twinge of guilt down deep inside.

"Right…" Ryan said, nodding his head and rolling his eyes.

* * *

She managed to sneak up on him sitting at the bar. She tried to stealthily read over his shoulder what he was writing in his spiral notebook but he felt her presence. She would never be sure if he smelled her near him or if her hair brushed his neck. He turned ever so slightly so that he could look at her, inches from her face. He smiled.

"Well, hello detective." He said softly. The way the words vibrated in his throat sounded so sexy she nearly melted into him right then. "How was the rest of your day?" he asked, leaning back. He gestured to the bar stool next to him, which she took.

"About the same as what you saw." She said, getting situated.

"So…boring." He said, looking both disappointed and relieved. She looked at him and smiled.

"Boring is good sometimes." She said, holding his eyes. "Boring means everyone is safe." She said, never breaking eye contact.

"Boring means no one is feeling any different today than they were yesterday." He said, while returning her gaze. The room disappeared for a moment as they sat entranced in one another for a moment. Finally, Beckett cleared her throat and looked away.

"I thought you promised me a drink." She said, staring at her hands on the bar.

"So I did. Pick your poison." He said. When she hesitated, he continued. "We've got crantini's, tequila sunrise…sex on a beach?" he asked and looked a little hopeful.

"Easy there boy. Jack and Coke will do just fine." She said, tapping the bar with her right hand.

"Oddly sexy in its own way." He said, stepping behind the bar to fix two drinks. He slid one to her like they do in the movies, making her laugh. "Wanna sit over there?" he asked, gesturing with his head to an empty table in a secluded corner. After a moment's hesitation, she bit her lip and nodded. She stood to follow him.

The chairs were situated to angle at one another from the same side of the table. They sat, almost afraid to touch one another. They sipped for a moment in silence. Finally he reached out to grab her hand on the table top.

"Kate…" he started, whispering her name almost reverently.

"Castle…." She replied, sighing. She felt so confused, conflicted, and frustrated. That last one, in more than one way.

"Come on, last week it was Rick." He said, looking her in the eye. Their bodies began to slowly lean towards one another, as if drawn by a magnet. When she didn't say anything, he continued. "I think we need to talk about…" he drifted off in memory as a small smile played on his lips.

"What's there to talk about Rick? We kissed, it was no big deal." He searched her eyes as she said that.

"I don't believe you." He said in a whisper.

"It can't be a big deal Rick." She said, sucking in air, bringing his body closer as she did. "I can't…"

"Don't tell me you don't think about that night in your dreams. Don't tell me you didn't feel that spark." His lips are mere inches from hers now, hovering slowly over hers. "Don't tell me you're not dying to try again right now." He cut the distance in half.

"Rick…" she sighed, almost resigning. He felt his lips touch hers and her body reacted without her consent. She felt like she was flying as she gave herself over to him wholly for that moment. When he pulled back she mumbled, "There's no way…" before capturing his lips again. Her stomach dropped again and slightly further south felt suddenly warm. She gasped as his tongue did things to her she'd never felt before. He devoured him completely in that kiss. They drew back to get air back into their lungs.

"Wow." He said, running his hands through his hair. "Kate, can't we…" he tried to start again. The moment the words began to leave his mouth though, he saw her walls go back up. He saw it cross her face.

"I can't. I need stable. You can't give me that." She said, and she was suddenly gone from her seat. He watched her back as she disappeared through the bar. He felt like she was slipping through his grasp and there were no tricks up his sleeve as there had been after the first case they worked together. He was going to have to take this slow, and take down one brick at a time until her walls were rubble at his feet. This wasn't going to change overnight.

A/N 2: Castle is so the girl in this relationship. Hence the "We need to talk" ;)


End file.
